On Monday night Louan wrote on her Facebook wall. Would her friends (who are legion) please send her good thoughts, white light, prayers, and visions of healing on Tuesday morning at 11:00 am, as she was going in for a biopsy and would need all the help she could get. An astonishing variety of loving messages poured in. I think her favorite may have been the one from her friend Jim: Good thoughts and a pinch of pixie dust . . .
On Tuesday morning when I arrived to cart her off to Traverse City, Louan was carrying a cat bag. Regular readers will recall that the Happy Cat Bag is an unfailing harbinger of good fortune. I did not take a picture of Louan with hers, but it was just like this one, and it cheered us up, indeed it did.
On the way down we digressed into this and that, with a pause at cedar smoke. It had not occurred to me that smudging the car with a little cedar smoke might have been a good idea. These are not the sorts of things that occur to me. I am a fairly point-to-point thinker. Louan is a non-linear person, and I regretted the lack of cedar. We were, after all, on a mission to combat an Invasive Species, and surely the sturdy native tree would be a valuable ally.
By 11:00 Louan was sitting in a waiting room, swathed in an uncomfortable gown, surrounded by women who had bought shoes from her. This was more helpful than you might think. We take our shoes seriously around here. Besides, spotting shoes that she has sent to a good home is one of Louan’s favorite pastimes. And everyone who ever bought shoes from Louan is always happy to see her. The shoes fit. They are comfortable. They are . . . pretty. The air filled with good thoughts, and maybe a little pixie dust. Then it was Louan’s turn. She disappeared through the door. We waited, the Sisterhood of the Shoes. My mind wandered to thoughts of cedar.
After a time, Louan emerged. The biopsy, she said, had hurt about as much as she thought it would. She was feeling fine. She had an ice pack tucked against the tender area. She would get some results early next week. She had an idea for a lot better design for a Biopsy Gown. Right now she would like to go to Sleder’s for a good lunch with a good drink, please. And off we went, Louan, her friend Joanne, two Happy Cat Bags and me.
We did not kiss the Sleder’s moose–that, Louan says, is for Fudgies, although personally I would have kissed the moose if I had been tall enough to reach it without a ladder. The excellent waitress brought Louan a margarita in a mug the size of a Viking drinking horn. I, alas, was the designated driver and the excellent waitress brought me a lemonade. I thought some more about cedar, and the importance of rituals. A candle is good.
Then it was time to go home and Await Developments. This may be the hardest part. I hope this will be the hardest part. I am thinking good, good thoughts and envisioning healthy tissue and hearing a doctor say that everything is going to be just fine. I am thinking that I could cut down a whole cedar tree and make a bonfire of it, smoke rising, rising, carrying Invasive Species away from Louan. She is not, she says, attached to any body part that has cancer in it. Take it off, she says, and get it away from me!
This morning I saw the sun sparkling in raindrops on the cedar, and I thought, well, smudging the Writing Studio and Bait Shop might be better than no smudging at all. It’s harder than you might think, lighting green cedar. But a determined person can usually get a fire going eventually.
I like to think of myself as a rationalist. That is pure whistling in the dark on my part, for I have all sorts of notions I do not admit to myself until I catch myself tossing salt over my shoulder or something of the sort. So I do not exactly believe in smudging, although it is a satisfying ritual. On the other hand, I believe in Louan, and I believe there are more things in heaven and earth than I understand. I believe in the power of a room full of women wearing ugly gowns and cute shoes. Bless every one of the Sisterhood, and the Brotherhood, too, while we’re at it. Bless you every one.
Carsten
June 10, 2010
Bless you Gerry.
You might be a point to point thinker, but you certainly reaches all the small important spots anyway.
Your writing allow all of us to send good thoughts and wishes for Louans future.
Gerry
June 10, 2010
Well, Good Morning, Carsten, and bless you back. I think goodwill is a valuable resource in the world, and Louan has contributed bushels of it to the supply. I hope she will bask in it this weekend–that everywhere she goes she will feel good wishes and blessings.
P.j. grath
June 10, 2010
Gerry, I have never met Louan but will be thinking of her today and wishing her good results from the biopsy. Just got excellent news from another friend who had unwittingly hosted an Invasive Species, as you put it.
The smudging. I don’t think a ritual is something you have to “believe in.” I mean, it isn’t a dogma or an item in a creed but something you do in a certain spirit, and I absolutely know your spirit was in the right place.
Hugs!
Gerry
June 10, 2010
I think you and David should come over here for a Stone Circle gathering sometime this summer. Then you can meet Louan. She will sing Leelanau County for you and that alone will be worth the trip. When she sings Woody Guthrie Dog you will be smitten.
Thank you for the hugs. I will pass them on to Louan. I find that gently used hugs are the best kind, sort of like a favorite sweater.
Cindy Lou
June 10, 2010
The waiting is the hard part – Louan is truly blessed to be surrounded by folks who love and cherish her! I, too, believe in the power of love and friendship and ugly gowns with cute shoes….prayers are wafting to heaven from my little corner of the world.
You and your new camera are bonding well, dear Gerry – your cedar photos are gorgemous…..especially the one with the dew drop! Frameable even…. 🙂
Gerry
June 10, 2010
Thank you, Cindy Lou. I think my job this weekend is to tend a garden of good wishes and prayers and loving thoughts flowing around Louan, and I appreciate your contribution.
I’m glad you like the dewdrop. I was sitting at the keyboard, pondering, when it winked at me. It was bright gold with a rainbow, and I thought at once of Louan. I could not manage to capture the gold or the rainbow, but they’re in there somewhere. I expect it’s like many blessings. We know they’re in there, even if we can’t see them at the moment.
Fee
June 10, 2010
My very best wishes to Louan for a good result on the biopsy. Been down that road with my Mum, and thank the great pumpkin, it’s all gone now.
Fingers crossed from Scotland
xxx
Gerry
June 10, 2010
The all gone part sounds really good. I figure when we reach critical mass on the good wishes, the Invasive Species will give up.
Fee
June 10, 2010
Spookily just heard from my mum – a very teary phone call (which made my heart go skippity a bit to start with) before she blubbed out the magic words.
“It’s been five years. I’m still clear. They don’t think it’s coming back”
Gerry
June 10, 2010
This is such good news. This is just wonderful. I will have to make sure Louan sees this comment. It’s important to know that there is lots and lots of hope. Very best to your mum.
Louan
June 10, 2010
Thank you all for supporting a total stranger in my quest to rid myself of this terror.
One of my friends once told me to allow her to help me, or how would she know she was truly my friend. That’s what friends do. Thank goodness, I have so many friends, with such healthy humor to share.
Gerry, you have such a heart. You can write about me any time.
Thanks again,
Louan
Gerry
June 10, 2010
Ah, but they are not total strangers, Louan. They have read about Louan and Gerry’s Excellent Adventure. They have read about the purchase of the Original Happy Cat Bag. They have read about songs you sing at Stone Circle and shoes you sell me at Stuff ‘n’ Such and meals we eat at Pearl’s. One way and another, you are mentioned fairly often around here. You have become a character in the ongoing saga of the Township, and a lovable character at that.
I will take you up on the permission, and write about you for years and years to come.
Anna
June 10, 2010
Bless you Gerry, and Louan. May all turn out so very well for Louan. Yes, rituals do help in doing something and soothing soul. The story you related had such a touch of spirit and beautiful telling and photos.
Gerry
June 10, 2010
Thank you, Anna.
More soon, I’m sure.
Molly
June 11, 2010
Notions are so important. And the word notion comes from the Latin (loaned from the Greek, I think) for “come to know.”
Difficult moments shared beautifully. Thanks, Gerry.
P.S. Sending lots of positive energy Louan’s way
Gerry
June 12, 2010
Positive energy flowing well, and very helpful in these parlous times. Thank you for your thoughtful contribution, Molly.